Casanova Notes

Online dating has exploded over the past few years and many people are now turning to the internet to meet people. There are a variety of paid and free sites including the popular eHarmony and Plenty of fish.

We recognize that internet and online dating can be a little intimidating, confusing, and even frustrating for many people. If you are looking for samples and advice on how to write an online dating profile, look no further.

This advice is based on the use of the free dating site, plenty of fish.

Writing your profile

We believe that your written profile is not as important as how you make your initial contact, that said, it shouldn’t deter people from replying and should create some additional value for you.

Do not make your profile too long. Keep it under 10 sentences and use white space. Include a passion outside of work or school and talk about how you like to stay busy.

You want your profile to make women think “oh wow this seems like a great guy that probably doesn’t have a lot of time to go out and meet new people” and not “this guy seems like he sits at home stalking people on the internet.” You likely won’t get a response if they think the latter.

How not to start your profile:

“I am a 27 year old male, 6ft 1in, 190lbs and athletic. Not looking for anything serious just casual hang outs and a fun time.”

I know 50 people that fit that description off the top of my head. Not only have you created no value, but your age, body type, and what you are looking for can be or is already included in the basic information on your profile, so you are not adding anything new.

The perfect picture

No matter how good you think your bare chest and stomach looks, do everyone a favour and leave that a mystery. It may work for some people, but we are focusing on creating value within your online profile.

So then what makes a good picture?

A good picture does what your conversation would. After all, a picture is worth one thousand words. Your main picture should be some sort of headshot in which you are smiling with teeth and looking into the camera so your eyes are visible.

Ideally, it should not be a self-taken photo or webcam shot and should have subtleties in the background that create a sense of intrigue.

A picture of you from your trip to Europe or down south, at a sporting event, or even a graduation. These subtle aspects in the background will build value by showing stability and a sense of intrigue and mystery.

Making initial contact

Initial contact is probably the most important part of picking up online. Remember to guide the conversation in a way that encourages her to reply. We recommend asking a question or two based on her profile or pictures and bringing yourself into her reality.

For example: “I see from your pictures that you are a dog lover :). My family had a black lab while I grew up, but unfortunately I haven’t lived in a place in the city that allows pets. Do you live inside the city? Is it difficult at times to care of her/him in [city name]?”

In three or four sentences you related yourself to something she loves – her dogs – and asked a couple questions that she is passionate about and will likely respond to.

Avoid long chit-chats

Similar to interactions in person, you want to avoid drawn out conversations that can allow things to go flat. This can easily happen if you bounce messages back and forth for weeks.

We recommend closing in your second or third message.

How to close and ask for the phone number

Closing online is similar to closing in person. You want to create a sense of urgency and force them to make a decision on the spot. You want them thinking either give this guy a shot or never hear from him again.

Here is a textbook close for how to pick up online. You can include it at the end of your second or third message.

“The next couple weeks will be quite busy for me with a couple projects and I doubt I’ll make it online much. I would love to get together for a cup of coffee or a drink some time if you wanted to give me your number maybe we can get together later in the week.”

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Did this help you out? Let us know, we would love to hear from you.